The year 2019 has brought me more personal growth and change than any other year I can remember. As the year winds to a close and I try to interpret the colorful painting of my transformation, brushstrokes from all areas of life blend together. In some parts of the painting, the fellowship’s brushstrokes are clearly apparent. In other areas, foreground colors obscure the GSBF brush’s presence. But the whole painting has been influenced in style, form, and shade by my fellowship experience. Over the past nine months, GSBF hasn’t directly changed my career plans, my view of social entrepreneurship, my spiritual beliefs, or my identity. But it has influenced all those areas in ways I may never fully understand. Let me explain. My fall 2018 study abroad experience in Bologna, Italy was my first time outside of North America, and I thoroughly enjoyed the freedom and novelty of exploring Europe. However, I didn’t feel much of a sense of purpose or community while in Bologna. The constantly-novel outer environment of Europe was enticing, but my inner landscape of beliefs remained relatively constant. When I returned to the familiar Santa Clara scene at the beginning of this year, a rumbling inner earthquake began to shake the beliefs and relationships I held dear. The mainstream culture of my protestant Christian upbringing felt foreign, and I questioned whether I was critically thinking about my beliefs or just apathetically skating by. This doubt extended into my personal life and professional ambitions as well. Was I pursuing growth in my relationships and career plans? Or was I taking the easy path to fit in? As I navigated these big questions, I knew deep down that GSBF was right for me. My temporary doubts about whether it would negatively affect my odds of landing a competitive business job faded away as I convinced myself to dive into the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Besides, the professors did keep using the term “junior consultants,” and I was considering consulting as a potential post-grad career option. I knew that I was passionate about creating social change through business, as well as connecting people to meaningful careers. But where to start? I had worked on marketing, design, and video-making projects in my previous internships, but I didn’t know if I liked that the tech design field was so detail-oriented. Late in spring quarter, I did a few informational interviews with recent Santa Clara graduates who had worked in consulting. One guy I talked to had also considered roles in product management and consulting, and chosen consulting because of the variety and big-picture thinking opportunities it provided. I felt like a first job in consulting would allow me to learn quickly about the way the business world worked so that I could move forward with valuable knowledge, experience, and opportunities. Three aspects of our summer project helped confirm that I wanted to work in consulting. First, our goal was to help Three Wheels United scale into New Delhi through a combination of market research, customer experience recommendations, and whatever other ideas came to mind. There were few formal boundaries or guidelines for the project. And I absolutely loved it. I love taking unruly, seemingly-boundless problems and working to frame, contextualize, research and solve them. Whiteboards, post-its, interview notes, process diagrams, PowerPoints… love it. I also enjoyed that our work involved multiple levels of collaboration. I got to work with end customers (auto drivers), a client (TWU staff), and an internal team (Rachael)—like a professional consulting engagement. Balanced with alone time to think, these social aspects made the work more meaningful and connected to Finally, I enjoyed being on a steep learning curve for the entirety of our summer. Rachael and I traveled to a new city almost every week, many with different geography, languages and cultural attitudes. I didn’t even know what an auto rickshaw was before the fellowship. Nearly every day, I would encounter something unexpected. Sure, the travel eventually got tiring, but the changing external environments helped me learn quickly and build a diverse array of experiences to inform the final product of our work. After arriving home, I was even more certain than before that I wanted to start my career in some sort of general business consulting. Here’s why. Most post-grad business jobs require tangible hard skills like data analysis, video-making, coding, or sales. Although I had dabbled in many different areas, I had avoided specializing in one. The types of work that I find meaningful are often found in more senior leadership positions: setting the vision for a team, telling a compelling story, or helping someone think about their problem in a new way. By taking a career in consulting, I could work on higher-level problems and hone a broad range of technical and social skills. Instead of specializing in a skill like data analysis, I can eventually focus on an industry (such as education, technology or energy) or project type (such as sustainability, change management, process improvement, or customer marketing). This path sounds much more exciting than “paying my dues” while starting at Excel for 8 hours every day. In the month before school started, I had calls with over 20 Santa Clara alumni working in consulting or product management (mostly at Accenture, Deloitte and LinkedIn). I was genuinely excited by the possibility of spending a couple of years working at any of these companies, both for the work itself and for the myriad of doors that a generalist career at a well-known company can open in the future. I expected to work hard attending on-campus recruiting events in the fall, but I also applied on a whim for an associate consultant role at Bain & Company, a prestigious management consulting firm that doesn’t recruit from Santa Clara. To my surprise, I got a first-round phone interview. The interview process moved quickly from there, and during our Week 2 GSBF class, I received a call that I had gotten the job. I was thrilled, and I accepted the offer later that week. This role was exactly what I had hoped for, and after speaking to over a dozen people from the company, I was convinced that it would be a perfect launching board for wherever I wanted to go next. I recognize the enormous privilege I’ve been given to participate in the fellowship and now get this job, and I feel a responsibility to use the power I’ve been given to participate in the creation of a better world. Although it will be thrilling to work in a fast-paced environment with bright people, earn a big paycheck, and quickly learn about the business world, I’m under no illusions that my role will be particularly impactful. Bain advertises its pro-bono work, social impact projects, and strong ethical code, but all the major management consulting companies basically help big companies get bigger. Although I’m inspired by social entrepreneurs and their bottom-up change-making movements, I don’t think that social enterprises will anytime soon have the scale to create the big changes our world needs to provide human rights or address the climate crisis. I believe that all businesses—the whole economic system—must evolve to consider social justice in every decision. Social enterprises can provide a model that corporations can fund and emulate, but every government and corporation in the world needs to prioritize justice along with income. In my career, I realize that the biggest impact I'll ever have may happen because of a question I raise in a meeting that shifts a company’s policy, or a change that I enact from a leadership position when I’m 60. Or maybe after a few years in the corporate world, I’ll become bored or disillusioned and shift to a mission-driven startup. Who knows! One advantage of the consulting path is just how many doors will remain open. My vision for integrating social entrepreneurship principles within corporations has parallels in my life: personal, professional, relational, and spiritual. There’s a Bible verse where Jesus says, “You won’t be able to say, ‘Here it is!’ or ‘It’s over there!’ For the Kingdom of God is already within you.” It’s a beautiful call for integration and unity. I don’t want businesses pointing to their corporate social responsibility, I want them to integrate social responsibility into their guiding principles. I don’t want people pointing to nature only when they’re in a forest, I want them to recognize their connection to the earth at every moment. I don’t want to point to an hour of volunteering or charitable donation as proof that I’m a good person, I want all my work to flow from a deep calling. I want my values to be integrated with all my actions, work and relationships, not just here or there.
What if we really believed that everything we needed for happiness, unity, and authentic living was already inside us? Not that we are independent, not that we should stop growing, not that the world is just. But that under layers of our ego and pride and desire to be special and superior lies a true self that is inherently good, connected, and eager to serve. As I have come to believe this more and more this year, my experience preparing for India, working in India, and reflecting on India has been a consistent thread. More than any lesson plan, assignment, or even in-field research activity, the aspect of GSBF that has impacted me the most is the people. I have deepened friendships with other fellows, networked with CEO’s and board members, learned from the professors, and grown immensely from collaborating with Rachael. I’m optimistic our deliverables will be useful to Three Wheels United, but the moments of deep connection, shared laughs, difficult discussions and reflection have made the experience valuable in ways that can’t be measured. Late in fall quarter, Thane surprised the class with some unconventional career advice. “Many of you may feel nervous about having so many options and decisions to make about your careers. But you shouldn’t worry so much, and here’s why,” he started. The class thought they knew what was coming next. “Whatever decision you make,” Thane said, “you’ll never be able to undo it. It will be permanent and unchangeable.” The class sat stunned, much more anxious than before. “Like this fellowship,” Thane continued, “you’ve done it, and now it will forever be a part of you. Each step in your career will open new doors and close others, and you’ll be a different person as a result.” Although this was not the common adage of “you can always change paths,” it is equally as true. And perhaps it’s even more valuable to be at peace with each step of your journey, content with where you’re at, and conscious of the person you’re becoming. At my core, I’m greedy. Successful impact-focused career, deep relationships, good health, good food, enough sleep, inner peace, world peace… I want it all. But to be healthy and sincere, all this striving must come from a place of deep enough-ness. Of being grateful for this stage in the journey at this moment. Of knowing that an inherent connection to humanity, the planet, and God is already within me. So there’s no going back, only continued becoming. But as I hold the painting of my last nine months in one hand, I hold a paintbrush in the other, ready for the next brushstroke.
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